answer:I am sorry to hear that your grandmother is in the hospital. That was very kind of you to think of making a meal for your family. This situation does sound pretty rude. A charitable interpretation would be that your sister in law was trying to help out, but did not express herself in the most tactful manner. Are you sure that she put an emphasis on the “homemade” with the intention of showing off/bragging/remonstrating you for not having made these things yourself? Are you reading too much into her intentions because you are stressed out? Why did your husband make a big deal out of your deciding not to make homemade dressing and gravy? Why was this even something he needed to tell his sister? As an outsider to your family, I find myself more upset at his initial action, rather than that of your sister in law, but I wasn’t there to witness it.