Right now you are a single mom, and with three little ones, don’t even bother trying to be anything else. Mommy and Daddy split up, and those kids need all the stability you can be for them. That means you, not boyfriends. What faces you is hectic, demanding, exhausting. Identity seeking should not be your focus now. Strength, stability, resolve, you need to brace yourself, and go. You may not hear your first name spoken for quite some time. Your identity is this kid’s mom, or that kid’s mom. In the words of the shrunken head on the Harry Potter movie, “You’re in for a bumpy ride!”