How can it be said that shaming doesn’t work when it influences people’s behavior even if they don’t admit that it does?

1 Answer

Answer :

answer:No one says shaming doesn’t influence behaviour – it’s just a dick thing to do, and by this point in time we should know better than to think we have the right to dictate other peoples’ behaviour in ways that have no effect on us, just to fit our own personal worldview. I wouldn’t consider attempting to educate people on issues that affect the public (like the public discussion on climate change and carbon emission) the same as, say, saying shitty things about people because of their weight, health, or fashion choices.

Related questions

Description : Do you tend to think the best or worst of people's intentions?

Last Answer : I either think they are doing it on purpose, or they’re stupid. Adults should know basic etiquette. Of course it also depends on what it is. I was thinking of something very annoying being done to me or something affecting a group of people.

Description : What do you call the tactic or behavior when someone makes a vague accusation along with a statement like "and yes, you do know what I'm talking about" when you have no clue what they're referring to, and they won't tell you?

Last Answer : Could you have received the text accidentally? Maybe it was a misfire? But I have no idea what that would be called.

Description : How do male humans display lek mating behavior?

Last Answer : Teasing and acting weird.

Description : If someone has some annoying behavior that you wish would change, have you found that doing something just as annoying to them in response can change the behavior?

Last Answer : I’m not a parent so have no idea in that form. Have tried to give idiot coworkers back what they gave out, and most times they all of a sudden become a poor little picked on victim that goes crying to the boss.

Description : Do you think that taking a video of someone can change their behavior?

Last Answer : Wouldn’t it be better to direct his conversation to more interesting topics, rather than trying to humiliate him into being silent?

Description : Would a manadatory volunteer program in your city be a positive reinforcement for good behavior?

Last Answer : The problem is the combination of voluntary and mandatory. My answer sort of depends on which is which. But if you truly mean voluntary, I think that is a good thing and I would encourage people ... the principle is no different than slavery or a military draft, which nobody thinks is a good thing.

Description : What kind of person could be so oblivious to their behavior?

Last Answer : Apparently, that guy.

Description : What do you do when someone you love exhibits behavior you detest in other people?

Last Answer : answer: Accept what you can change, change what you can accept . That's the saying I always stick to. To tell the truth, my best friend has some behavior that I really dislike. But I still try to put up ... her good one are just like a drop of ink on a white paper. Or maybe I'm just too tolerant

Description : What are some examples of passive/aggressive behavior?

Last Answer : Here

Description : Is there a difference in student behavior in colleges with primarily low income students?

Last Answer : I have noticed (as an apartment manager) that kids who are paying their own way tend to party way less than kids who have mommy and daddy paying the bills.

Description : Is this a normal or rude behavior?

Last Answer : The rudeness was in not obeying your mother. It made her look bad… and you, too.

Description : Could someone help me understand the this strange behavior (inside for details)

Last Answer : Depending on your age, puberty & hormones are big factors in the answer to “why” in the sudden change.

Description : What was/is your self-destructive behavior?

Last Answer : Alcohol I guess. Not quite sure what else to add to that lol.

Description : How do you interpret a person's behavior that is always aloof and evasive?

Last Answer : I think it could be a wide range of things from what you described all the way to a person who is painfully shy and quiet.

Description : Do you think there is any "switching of roles" involved in the recent behavior here?

Last Answer : answer:@poofandmook Honestly, hearing people complain that they can't answer the questions in general because of the new rules immediately made discipline come to my mind. All it takes is a little discipline to not ... a gray head , so I can't really say who is having a harder time with it.

Description : Do we control our personality, or just our behavior?

Last Answer : Any psychiatrist will tell you personality disorders are the most intractable . . and can only be managed with behavioral/cognitive therapy. What does that tell you?

Description : What is inappropriate behavior for an adult?

Last Answer : That’s not inappropriate, it’s AWESOME.

Description : Do you have any weird behavior that you cannot explain?

Last Answer : Sometimes, I’m just so damn awesome, that other people hand stand to be around me for extended periods of time, and I find myself alone.

Description : What human attribute separates us from animals? Your answer doesnt have to be serious.

Last Answer : Thumbs, mostly.

Description : If you're slightly intoxicated on a Friday because you have a night off from parenting and work what would you avoid saying on Fluther so people don't get mad?

Last Answer : I don’t drink, but I know drunken fluthering is a very popular pastime here. Enjoy!

Description : If someone asks a question, and you answer that question honestly, even though the answer might upset the OP, should you refrain from answering honestly?

Last Answer : answer:I agree, sometimes calling a spade a spade is the only way to go. If the Jerk fits, and all that. Jerk is pretty mild when it comes to name calling. I think it has to do with A. Who the ... grievance just looking for a cause is okay as long as the word you is not used as an intro. haha

Description : Do people do things they don't really mean under the influence of alcohol or do they do things they really want but are ashamed of wanting?

Last Answer : answer:Well, alcohol is said to inhibit a person's inhibitors. But, I have seen my friends who are alcoholics really do and say very mean things that I do not believe is really who they are. Alcohol ... . I don't see why we should considered the liquored up brain the true self? Just my opinion.

Description : Is it lame or abnormal that I don't have friends?

Last Answer : Clearly it is. You do not want to get a job because you have to work with people you don’t know. It is not any more clearer that you need to work some issues out.

Description : If I think it, but don't say it, is it still body shaming?

Last Answer : Yes. And thinking about traveling requires a passport.

Description : Are there times when you don't even want to admit certain things even to yourself?

Last Answer : answer:Hmmm .thinking. Nope. Can't tell you that one! But there is .no. Not that one either. Sorry. ;) My sister gets very, very angry when I say that Mom was a little batty. She was, but my ... what difference it makes. Same thing with my dad. He was aloof and hardly knew me at all as an adult.

Description : When using the bathroom in a public place (restaurant, work, store, etc.), do you check the toilet seat after using and make sure it appears clean before exiting the stall?

Last Answer : I do. It’s automatic, for me.

Description : I did something bad to my girlfriend. But I've been goin' to the therapist and done a lot of hard work. Am I always going to be sad for what I did?

Last Answer : answer:What do you mean by bad? What difference does it make how strangers judge you? Why do you care if you're bad or whatever? What matters is what the people you hope to be in relationships ... don't believe you won't harm anyone again. Not until you've got a seriously history of being good.

Description : What are some way that the media influences consumer behavior?

Last Answer : News broadcastsAdvertisingProduct placement.Risk Aversion

Description : What would you do if you had plans with someone and they cancelled due to being sick but then you saw posts they put on FB, showing they went out anyway?

Last Answer : Why “do” anything ?? The liar-person was just revealing who they are. You pull the plug and move on. I’m not on Facebook, but…..isn’t that the purpose of the ‘Unfriend’ thing ??

Description : Double doors: Do we only want to use the door they locked, or, do they lock the door everyone wants to use?

Last Answer : I know that sorta pisses me off at times I will just unlock the locked one. I could never figure out why they couldn’t just unlock both.

Description : When it comes to questions on ethics, are people honest in their answers, or do they lean more towards answering in a vague PC way so as to not appear in an unflattering way?

Last Answer : Most people would knock him off the bike and pound him. And not feel bad about it.

Description : For ask-publicites over 50. Do you feel the older you get the more people feel they need to control your life?

Last Answer : answer:I'm hopeful that it's just you (and just a phase). I'm sometimes astonished at the level of deference I'm accorded simply because I appear to know what I'm doing, what I want, or that I'm ... er done' some other way and walk away with better attitudes. I'm rambling, and I'm not even drunk.

Description : Do you write people off when they give advice about a gender they are not part of?

Last Answer : Oh jeez, women are such a pain in the butt.

Description : Are they saying it just to say it?

Last Answer : It’s formulaic. Better to say, “What can I do? Be specific.”

Description : What act of kindness have you recently done for a total stranger, either because they requested it or for no reason at all?

Last Answer : answer:A crack head came up to me one day while I was working and wanted some money. I had an extra sandwich in my lunch box and offered it to him instead. He said no thanks. And I said Are ... didn't understand really, he was wanting some money to get a sandwich so he said. It hurt my feelings.

Description : What would you do if you saw kids acting inappropriately in a fast food place, where they might be hurt?

Last Answer : answer:I would have grabbed the little brats, twisted their ears, and gave them a big kick in the rumps! Lol. Seriously, I would have walked over to the mother and told her what her kids were doing, ... though I'd love to) Going over and tellling the brats myself, in a firm manner, would work too.

Description : Did these bullies always get a slap on the wrist and that is why they felt they could set another kid on fire?

Last Answer : answer:People always say stuff like this and it makes no sense to me. They set someone on fire. That isn't something that can be fixed with a good ol' spankin' . The kids who did that are fucked up. They ... d be thinking wow, I seriously fucked my kid up and I hope it's not too late to fix this.

Description : How come if someone smiles at or compliments someone of the same gender it's considered being nice, whereas if they do the same to the opposite gender it's viewed as flirtatious?

Last Answer : Nonsense that is not flirty, and if someone thinks that they have a narrow mind.

Description : What would cause a person to do everything they can for everyone but their wife and child?

Last Answer : Resentment perhaps. He views his family as an obligation and a weight. Something that holds him back and down. Not as a blessing. Everyone else becomes and excuse to get away from them. To be free of them. Just spitballing here.

Description : What do you think people mean when they talk about personal boundaries?

Last Answer : I have a friend who had a big problem with encroaching on boundaries. She used to poke my boyfriend on facebook, whom she had never met or spoken to. She contacted someone else I was casually dating ... for all the rest of your questions, those would have to be answered on a case-by-case basis.

Description : What does it mean when people do rude things as they walk near or past you?

Last Answer : not only teens.. You can notice this sort of behavior also with Security guards and mean bus drivers. Anyone who hates their job really. I think people tend to mistreat others whenever they don’t perceive there to be a benefit in investing in that relationship.

Description : Is it just me that whenever I talk to someone and they disregard what I'm saying to them, I take it as a sign of disrespect?

Last Answer : No, it isn’t just you! It is disrespectful! I would deal with them by not saying a word to them! They’ll notice more than likely and when they ask you, well just tell them how you feel and maybe that will work! It worked for my aunt once anyway!

Description : Why do most people put their heads down as they pass others?

Last Answer : You do awkwardly smile at people who don’t know you, though.

Description : What do you do with your hands when they aren't in use?

Last Answer : wha? uh, i guess ask-public.

Description : Would you be angry if someone told you to calm down while you were panicking?

Last Answer : “Panic” has multiple meanings, so I’ll go with how you seem to be using it here (someone is upset about something). Telling someone to “calm down” is dismissive and I suspect you know that (your “snowflake” political declaration is pretty transparent).

Description : What is the difference between manic depression and bipolar depression?

Last Answer : Manic depression is the older term for what is now called bipolar disorder.

Description : Can a person be mature and childish at the same time?

Last Answer : “Childish” is when an older person behaves like a toddler: selfish, complaining, self focused, immature. “Childlike” is when an older person has the qualities of a child: open, exploring, celebratory, fun, seeing the good in things. It can be very pleasant to be around someone mature and childlike.

Description : What might possibly happen when Trump goes to England to meet the queen?

Last Answer : Wow—I can’t wait to see what the answers ON FLUTHER will be—

Description : Is there a downside of being a flexible, optimistic person?

Last Answer : The downsides, as I see them, are - People take your optimism and flexibility as naivety and a lack of backbone. Also see Why is enthusiasm often perceived as naivety? - The perception that there's ... to you. Just work on a healthy balance and realize what others see in your outlook and actions.

Description : What do you do if you forget to acknowledge someone's birthday?

Last Answer : I do one or more of what you named above. It depends whose birthday I forgot and how much time passed when I finally remembered.