This all depends on the type of restaurant…but there are definitely some ground rules. 20% tip, always. Unless the service was awful. Then 15%. If the service is great, higher than 20%. You shouldn’t have to ask for refill, at a place like Applebee’s, don’t expect them to wait on you hand and foot, you’ll have to ask. Still give 20% tip. Nicer restaurants, they should be keeping an eye on you, and be able to bring you a new drink before you even ask. Ordering just water is fine. They don’t care. It just sucks because that means the bill won’t be as high, it’s not your fault if you don’t want to have a drink drink. If they act bitter towards you because of this, then they suck at the service industry. It’s a stressful job because you have to be attending to multiple tables all at once, meeting their needs before they even ask. To avoid being “part of the problem”, just be courteous, don’t treat them like servants, they’re just doing their job.