This is a multi-part question. 1) What steps have you taken to find out what makes you happy in life 2) What are the specific things that make you most happy 3) And, how successful have you been at making the things that make you happy a part of your life?

This is a multi-part question. 1) What steps have you taken to find out what makes you happy in life 2) What are the specific things that make you most happy 3) And, how successful have you been at making the things that make you happy a part of your life?
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answer:To find out what makes me happy, I had to strip myself of all pretenses. I had to let go of all guilt, anger, shame, pain, blame, resentment, and especially fear. I had to get to the deepest part of myself and find out what my core values are in life. Then I had to start living by those values. I had to acknowledge that the only thing that I can control are my actions. I can not control anyone or anything else. I can not control my thoughts or feelings, but I do control how I choose to act based on them. I had to dig through tons of garbage I had learned from a highly dysfunctional childhood and the poor choices I made earlier in adulthood based on those things, and re-parent myself. I had to learn to stop hating myself, and holding myself to the expectations of family, friends, or society. I had learn to forgive, accept, then appreciate, and finally love myself. I had to learn how to be true to myself and pursue what is important to me. In doing so, I found a vocation that suits my personality very well, and I am good at it and still love doing it after 16 years. As for my personal life, I sleep so much better at night not worrying about all the stuff I have no control and minimal influence over. The relationship I have with my teenaged son is so much closer because I am teaching by example, rather than telling him to do one thing and then defying my own advice. I have yet to find success in a romantic relationship, but that is because most people in our culture are caught-up in the head games of pleasing others and looking to superficial means for fulfillment. Happiness truly does not come from anyone or anything outside of you. It can only be found within. “This above all: to thine own self be true, And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any man.” Shakespeare Hamlet
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