We all make time when it suits us to some extent, but in the context of a relationship, you would expect that each wants to lessen the inconvenience for the other and so not be so fixed on convenience for themselves. Relationships include a great deal of compromise. If one or the other party is not amenable to flexibility in making time for the other, and are not willing to compromise to some extent, then they are likely not into the relationship. On the other hand, its also not about self-flagellation, and you must be careful not to throw too much into it if it is not going to be reciprocated. Edit: Maybe I’m just an idealist, but thankfully that’s the way it works in my relationship. We both make time for each other, and are both inconvenienced, but its worth it.