answer:Good question. I suppose it depends on what you mean by “polite”. I like to think of politeness as closely tied to sincerity. I don’t find it polite when people apologize for things they needn’t apologize for. It stinks of insincerity and it pisses me off. @Mariah: “Conversely, self-respect is vital to a person’s happiness. But at what point does refusing to take shit from anybody become selfish?” I do not interpret the refusal to take shit from people as a selfish act. If my friend comes to me – this has happened – and told me that he feels I am judging him too much etc, I welcome such information. “Listen, Tom, you arrogant fuck. I am not going to continue to listen to _______…” We’re better friends for it. I respect him more, and he also forced me to investigate my own actions and intentions, which actually resulted in improvements in me. I feel better. He feels better. The friendship is better. Nobody is getting shit on. @Mariah: “Should friends be willing to tolerate a little shit here and there from each other?” Maybe. It all depends on the “shit” I suppose. I find that many people I know tend to judge the closest people in their lives more harshly than those they supposedly do not like. Many people also have a tendency to take their friends for granted. So, my answer == polite can mean being brutally honest with someone. Therefore, there is no problems with self-respect or low self-esteem. The things that a good friend should expect from you are the qualities that best allow you to thrive.