When I was a young teenager and a virgin, I thought I was pregnant (because I sat in the bathtub and thought that maybe my brother’s sperm went up my vagina..he took a shower before me and I knew he masturbated in the shower…okay, please don’t ask) and drove everyone insane until mom took me to the doctor and he said I’m not pregnant and that I was wrong – incidentally, this was when the whole Monica Lewinski/Clinton fiasco happened because I remember it being on TV in the waiting area.