answer:@josie: “When I got divorced, and also when a couple of friends got divorced, the general rule seemed to be…” If the girl leaves it is because the guy is an asshole. If the guy leaves it is because he is an asshole.” You need to move. Here’s what happens around here when a couple gets divorced: if the guy leaves, the guy has left. If the woman leaves, than the woman has left. If there are kids involved, the kids have to deal with all of the shit. The woman’s friends support the woman, the men’s friends support the man. I suspect that you are either paranoid, or you live in a strange part of the country.