Health is important. I’m sorry you allude to having many difficulties. I hope you have a good doctor. Tell him/her your frustrations. S/He may have some very good ideas about how to feel better or how to stop thinking about it so much. I have some health issues, and meditation helps me a great deal to remain calm despite the difficulties. I also find good quality sleep is important, too. Exercise helps, but I’ve got some foot issues that’s making that impossible at the moment, and I miss it.