What is the funniest, best, or most creative/original outgoing message you have ever heard on a telephone answering machine?

What is the funniest, best, or most creative/original outgoing message you have ever heard on a telephone answering machine?
by

1 Answer

Answer :

George Costanza
by

Related questions

Does your US telephone service provider supply you with a phone book?

Description : Does your US telephone service provider supply you with a phone book?

Last Answer : Somebody throws phone books on my front step. It is somebody’s phone company, but I have only prepaid phones. I don’t use a phone enough to keep an account with anyone.

Will landline telephones become extinct?

Description : Will landline telephones become extinct?

Last Answer : For personal use, certainly. I don’t think I know a single person my age who still has a landline. I could see corporations continuing to use them (call centers, etc).

Are you already on the DO NOT CALL list to keep telemarketers from calling you your cellphone...?

Description : Are you already on the DO NOT CALL list to keep telemarketers from calling you your cellphone...?

Last Answer : answer:I registered with the National Do Not Call Registry a while ago. From what it says, your number remains on it permanently due to the Do-Not-Call Improvement Act of 2007, which became law ... links to Snopes, but @MissAnthrope beat me too it. That has been floating around since about 2004.

What is Telecommunications?

Description : What is Telecommunications?

Last Answer : In the world of modern technology and technological progress, communication services are in great demand. Indeed, it is difficult now to imagine modern life without such seemingly mundane ... cable, and setting up equipment and networks, subsequent maintenance, the activities of consultants.

Is a long recorded song clip on one's answering machine or outgoing voicemail -- a form or symptom of egocentrism?

Description : Is a long recorded song clip on one's answering machine or outgoing voicemail -- a form or symptom of egocentrism?

Last Answer : They probably might just want to share the song with other people and see if they like it, but it could also be something else.

What's the best way to make an mp3 of an answering machine message?

Description : What's the best way to make an mp3 of an answering machine message?

Last Answer : Get someone with an iPhone to record it like you’ve suggested using the “Voice Memos” app that’s on every iPhone, and then have them e-mail the file to you. It will probably sound fine.

If you could have anyone record a message for your voicemail/answering machine who would it be?

Description : If you could have anyone record a message for your voicemail/answering machine who would it be?

Last Answer : answer:HAL 9000. But I’d want it to be a real AI, not just a pre-recorded message. Of course, I’m not gonna make the mistake of letting Hal control my pod-bay doors. My pod-bay doors are gonna be locked by an old-fashioned mechanical key and opened with an ordinary handle.

How Do I Put a message on a GE Answering Machine?

Description : How Do I Put a message on a GE Answering Machine?

Last Answer : answer:Your answering machine gives you massages? In all seriousness, do you see a Greeting button? And if not…didn’t it come with a manual?

What type of clause is shown in parentheses Carla had left a message on the answering machine about (whomever you had spoken to).?

Description : What type of clause is shown in parentheses Carla had left a message on the answering machine about (whomever you had spoken to).?

Last Answer : Adjective

I need advice on answering clients requests on last minute work or even asking for creative work done over the weekend?

Description : I need advice on answering clients requests on last minute work or even asking for creative work done over the weekend?

Last Answer : First, when someone first comes to you with a project, give something with your process on it in writing and your boundaries. Example (Not to meant to be comprehensive, just to give you the idea.): How ... say (and repeat as necessary), I'm sorry that's not possible. Never get into explanations.

For how many years has the rule of answering seven creative questions in SSC exam been made ?

Description : For how many years has the rule of answering seven creative questions in SSC exam been made ?

Last Answer : Since 2017, seven creative questions have been answered in SSC exams.

What is ‘Teletext’ ? (1) Flashing of telephone conversation on TV screen. (2) Printing the text of the message on the telex machine. (3) Connecting the local telephone with outstation telephones without STD codes. (4) Flashing of the text of news and information on the TV screen.

Description : What is ‘Teletext’ ? (1) Flashing of telephone conversation on TV screen. (2) Printing the text of the message on the telex machine. (3) Connecting the local telephone with outstation telephones without STD codes. (4) Flashing of the text of news and information on the TV screen.

Last Answer : Flashing of the text of news and information on the TV screen. 

When were the first telephone answering machines for home use put on the market?

Description : When were the first telephone answering machines for home use put on the market?

Last Answer : answer:“In 1983 Kazuo Hashimoto received a patent for a Digital Answering Machine architecture with US Patent 4,616,110. The first Digital Answering Machine brought to the market was AT&T’s 1337” So, I guess the early 80’s. Source

What is the best business telephone answering service?

Description : What is the best business telephone answering service?

Last Answer : You can call Hutchbug Solutions for the best Telephone Answering Service in USA. They offer you best service at affordable rates.

The Internet Control Message Protocol (ICMP) A. allows gateways to send error acontrol messages toother gateways or hosts B. provides communication between the Internet Protocol Software on one machine and the InternetProtocol Software on another C. reports error conditions tothe original source, the source must relate errors to individual applicationprograms and takeaction to correct theproblem D. All of theabove E. None of the above

Description : The Internet Control Message Protocol (ICMP) A. allows gateways to send error acontrol messages toother gateways or hosts B. provides communication between the Internet Protocol Software on one machine ... and takeaction to correct theproblem D. All of theabove E. None of the above

Last Answer : All of theabove

What is the funniest thing you have ever heard that you couldn't actually laugh at?

Description : What is the funniest thing you have ever heard that you couldn't actually laugh at?

Last Answer : answer:For me, it was something my uncle said. My uncle, my aunt, my parents and I were driving somewhere in my uncle's conversion van. I was sitting behind all them in the back seat. My dad and uncle ... anyone to know that I got it. Still one of the funniest things I have ever heard in my life.

What's the funniest spoonerisms you've ever heard or said?

Description : What's the funniest spoonerisms you've ever heard or said?

Last Answer : Our Father who art in heaven, Howard be thy name.

What is the funniest excuse you ever heard for being overweight?

Description : What is the funniest excuse you ever heard for being overweight?

Last Answer : answer:I had a friend who insisted it was just baby fat nevermind we were in highschool I saw her several years later and she was stick thin said I told you it was just baby fat. I started ... it was just water weight. I took water pills. They thought this was the funniest thing they ever heard.

Can I start a post called "The funniest thing I ever heard?"?

Description : Can I start a post called "The funniest thing I ever heard?"?

Last Answer : Oh that’s so funny.

What's the funniest joke you've ever heard?

Description : What's the funniest joke you've ever heard?

Last Answer : What do you call a prostitute with a runny nose? Full!

What is the most terrible yet funniest joke you've ever heard?

Description : What is the most terrible yet funniest joke you've ever heard?

Last Answer : I hope you don’t take this the wrong way, because I’m genuinely unsure of what you’re asking. By “worst” do you mean “most offensive,” or literally a bad joke? I can’t tell, because the example in the question doesn’t strike me as funny, but it could be offensive… so in what way do you mean “worst?”

What is the cutest/funniest thing you have ever heard a young child say or mispronounce?

Description : What is the cutest/funniest thing you have ever heard a young child say or mispronounce?

Last Answer : Instead of “truck” he said “Look at my fuck!”

What is the funniest, weirdest expletive that you have ever heard?

Description : What is the funniest, weirdest expletive that you have ever heard?

Last Answer : Ham wallet Douche nozzle Both great…

What's the funniest name you've ever heard of for a pet?

Description : What's the funniest name you've ever heard of for a pet?

Last Answer : D. O. Gee

What is the funniest REAL person's name you've ever heard of?

Description : What is the funniest REAL person's name you've ever heard of?

Last Answer : Mrs. Featherbottom from Arrested Development

Whats the funniest knock-knock joke you've ever heard?

Description : Whats the funniest knock-knock joke you've ever heard?

Last Answer : One of my favorites is the old— Knock, knock. Who’s there? That’s right.

What`s the funniest joke you`ve ever heard?

Description : What`s the funniest joke you`ve ever heard?

Last Answer : There once was a man from Nantucket….oh, wait. Nevermind.

Whats the funniest pick up line u ever heard? Or used

Description : Whats the funniest pick up line u ever heard? Or used

Last Answer : answer:i’ve said this before on here but so what “are you jewish? ‘cause you Israeli hot” (my apologies to the offended)

The funniest joke youve ever heard?

Description : The funniest joke youve ever heard?

Last Answer : answer:What do you get when you pour boiling water down a rabbit hole?? hot cross bunnies

What is the funniest joke you’ve ever heard?

Description : What is the funniest joke you’ve ever heard?

Last Answer : Two dudes were sitting on shed steps in New Orleans and one asked, “Which is furthest away, New York or the moon?” The other rolled his eyes. “Hello, can you see New York from here?”

Whats the funniest last name you've ever heard of (real answers only please)?

Description : Whats the funniest last name you've ever heard of (real answers only please)?

Last Answer : "Thumb"​like how does that become a name?

What is the funniest text message you have received?

Description : What is the funniest text message you have received?

Last Answer : for me... it was the 3 am "u up?" text from a shady sleeze i was avoiding. i'm pretty sure he sent them out to 30 girls each night.

What is the funniest true story you’ve heard?

Description : What is the funniest true story you’ve heard?

Last Answer : Obama winning the Nobel Peace Prize in 2009 and Hitler, Stalin, Nixon, Khomeini, Putin, and Trump being Times person of the year.

What is the funniest thing you have seen, heard, been a part of? Would it be considered funny now?

Description : What is the funniest thing you have seen, heard, been a part of? Would it be considered funny now?

Last Answer : There’s a video of a screaming goat (non-violent. ) It’s very simple. But it makes me laugh, every time. It hasn’t gotten old…

What are some of the funniest things you've said or heard when talking on the phone?

Description : What are some of the funniest things you've said or heard when talking on the phone?

Last Answer : I've got friends who pick up the phone already talking to someone. One mommy does that so regularly, sometimes I'm waiting five minutes before she greets me. I get to hear things like, Well just go to ... . Suddenly her voice bursts directly into my ear, Oh, it's you! How do you spell catalyst?

What's the funniest/best put-down you've personally heard?

Description : What's the funniest/best put-down you've personally heard?

Last Answer : answer:The best insults are Shakespearean, and my favorite is from Othello: Thou dolt, you’re as ignorant as dirt.

What is the strangest/funniest thing that you have heard/seen all week?

Description : What is the strangest/funniest thing that you have heard/seen all week?

Last Answer : “I am on a drug, it’s called ‘Charlie Sheen.’ It’s not available ‘cause if you try it once you will die. Your face will melt off, and children will weep over your exploded body.” – Charlie Sheen

What's the funniest slip-up you've heard someone else say?

Description : What's the funniest slip-up you've heard someone else say?

Last Answer : When I was studying in Argentina I had to have an evaluation by the school couselor at the start of the semester. She asked me what activities I enjoyed and one of them was fiestar a verb for ... Argentina this means to have an orgy. The woman did not stop laughing through the rest of our meeting.

What's the funniest incident of technology failing you or someone else that you've heard of?

Description : What's the funniest incident of technology failing you or someone else that you've heard of?

Last Answer : it can be from any time frame, not necessarily recent. Once I find an incident, I get to relate it in a way that could have been prevented, how it affected the company, and what to do now to prevent it from happening again.

What's the funniest/most bizarre question you've heard from a kid?

Description : What's the funniest/most bizarre question you've heard from a kid?

Last Answer : answer:I was 14 when some kid Asked, “excuse me sir, what time is it?” my “if you Stop calling me sir, i’ll tell you the time” … :)

Would it be possible to build a phone answering machine that answers differently depending on who is calling?

Description : Would it be possible to build a phone answering machine that answers differently depending on who is calling?

Last Answer : My Nokia answering machine feature does just that. Different ring tones.

What's the best phone (with answering machine) to buy?

Description : What's the best phone (with answering machine) to buy?

Last Answer : Are you talking a wall phone or a cell phone?

Do they make an answering machine with caller options for one phone line

Description : Do they make an answering machine with caller options for one phone line

Last Answer : Need Answer

Phone and Answering Machine Combos Add Efficiency to Landline Service?

Description : Phone and Answering Machine Combos Add Efficiency to Landline Service?

Last Answer : Just about everyone that purchases landline phone service isalso going to purchase an answering machine. That's just how itworks. You're going to want to know who called and what theywanted, and ... the hassle of trying to make sureeverything is installed and working right, and that's worth thehighe

How to Create a Greeting On Your Answering Machine?

Description : How to Create a Greeting On Your Answering Machine?

Last Answer : Most people hate to record a greeting on their answering machinealmost as much as they hate to leave a message on someone else'sanswering machines. In all actuality it is much less difficult thanwhat ... say. Do not give out any information on your recording that youdon't want everyone who call

Are there any answering machine and phone units that can be accessed remotely?

Description : Are there any answering machine and phone units that can be accessed remotely?

Last Answer : Most modern answering machines can be accessed by calling your home number and letting the phone ring. You then have to enter a code when the answering machine picks up. This is a very common feature.

Can I add a digital answering machine to my analog phone?

Description : Can I add a digital answering machine to my analog phone?

Last Answer : Yes there will be no problems with this system.

What's the most creative curse-phrase you've ever heard?

Description : What's the most creative curse-phrase you've ever heard?

Last Answer : My roommate was having a really horrible day, everything that could possibly go wrong, did. Finally, after a day of getting caught in the pouring rain without an umbrella, missing an important meeting, stolen ... she shouted at the top of her lungs and blurted out: Fudge Monkey Possum SHIT!!!!!

How creative is this don't drink and drive prank/message?

Description : How creative is this don't drink and drive prank/message?

Last Answer : I doubt it worked. It was kind of a cool, albeit fucked up, idea, but he didn’t seem to take it seriously.

Audio experts: what's the best way to pipe a pre-recorded message to a telephone conference call?

Description : Audio experts: what's the best way to pipe a pre-recorded message to a telephone conference call?

Last Answer : Put the speaker next to the receiver?