How do I tell my Mother it's ok to slow down and don't worry about who gets what - right after my Father's death?

How do I tell my Mother it's ok to slow down and don't worry about who gets what - right after my Father's death?
by

1 Answer

Answer :

It sounds like she’s doing the ‘keep busy’ thing to deal (or not deal) with her grief. Maybe you could point that out to her, and suggest that she keep busy in some other way if she feels the need to. Tell her that you are not ready to handle this task just yet. Again, my sympathies to you and your family.
by

Related questions

How do you deal with finding out your mother has cancer? How is one to come to terms with this?

Description : How do you deal with finding out your mother has cancer? How is one to come to terms with this?

Last Answer : answer:Cancer is no longer a death sentence. What kind does she have? Don't panic. You want to be loving and calm for her sake. I am a 16-year survivor of breast cancer. Half of my ... years of meds. It is doable. Cancer does not discriminate for or against strength, gender and educational goals.

After having lost a loved one (a few years ago), is it normal to shut down somewhat during the ********* holidays?

Description : After having lost a loved one (a few years ago), is it normal to shut down somewhat during the Christmas holidays?

Last Answer : The death of someone you love can hit you at the most unexpected times and for an undetermined number of years. Grief affects everyone differently but there are a lot of predictable wipe-outs. Do what is best for ... can be happy and then - pow!. You live with it always; it is what makes us human.

When grieving, is it better to do things in order to remember (the bond, or love, is still there, though it hurts intensely) -- or suppress and forget?

Description : When grieving, is it better to do things in order to remember (the bond, or love, is still there, though it hurts intensely) -- or suppress and forget?

Last Answer : I think there is no right or wrong way to grieve and no one can dictate to another how it should be done.

What do no longer care about from your past?

Description : What do no longer care about from your past?

Last Answer : “What do you no longer care about your past?” That I was a loser. I was trying to hard to fit in with my classmates. I thought something was wrong with me. Now I know my problem was that I cared too much to fit in.

How do you find out what stage of grief that you are in?

Description : How do you find out what stage of grief that you are in?

Last Answer : Stages of grief is a very personal thing. The process for you might be nothing like the process for me. I've found that dealing with my grief day by day & NOT focusing on when it will be over helps me ... easier to deal with. I don't think that you can rush your grieving pocess just deal with it!!!

Have you ever dodged a bullet? (details inside).

Description : Have you ever dodged a bullet? (details inside).

Last Answer : I was cruising back roads on 4 wheel drive fire trails in National Parks in Southern Illinois and on our way out there was logs blocking laying across the road. I got out and moved them and the minute ... doom on their mind .l had hot shower and another 50 years to live on my mind. Fucktards

Should I stay in or am in denial about getting ahead?

Description : Should I stay in or am in denial about getting ahead?

Last Answer : answer:Excuse my tone but WHY DO YOU INSIST ON LABELING YOURSELF AS DISABLED ???? Are you in some kind of comfort zone where you just put up a DISABLED banner to avoid certain situations? Actually, ... Please forgive the outburst but it is sad to see young lives going to waste? GET ON WITH IT!

I just purchased a Minecraft server, can anyone give me some advice/help regarding permissions and ranks and grief protection?

Description : I just purchased a Minecraft server, can anyone give me some advice/help regarding permissions and ranks and grief protection?

Last Answer : I recently purchased a realm. It simplifies the process while maintaining most of the functionality. Have you given that a shot?

What happens if you put off grieving the loss of a loved one?

Description : What happens if you put off grieving the loss of a loved one?

Last Answer : If you try that it will eat your heart up from the inside out. I’ve lost a lot of loved ones. It hurts. But it’s best just to deal with it and don’t try to pretend it doesn’t.

Did "In Loving Memory of..." start with the gang banger thug culture?

Description : Did "In Loving Memory of..." start with the gang banger thug culture?

Last Answer : If a person gets sad and distraught over a sticker, they have other problems.

Have you ever been in a position in which you have said "it can't end like this"?

Description : Have you ever been in a position in which you have said "it can't end like this"?

Last Answer : Absolutely - this person was the only person that's now out of my life because of their own volition - if I could have done anything else to keep em in my life, I would have and to this day, ... like this ' and I worry (and this deeply troubles me) that they will die without ever speaking to me.

Advice or support for someone dealing with grief?(Myself) Thanks.

Description : Advice or support for someone dealing with grief?(Myself) Thanks.

Last Answer : Take a long hot shower everyday. Let the water slowly wash away your sorrows. I mean if running water can cut the grand canyon, why not, right? worked for me at least

How do I deal with this guilt?

Description : How do I deal with this guilt?

Last Answer : I am sorry for your loss. Your situation sounds complex, like most situations with elderly family members who want to retain their independence. It was made much more so by the family tensions you ... and full life and realize that being in a nursing home would not necessarily have been a panacea.

What are some of the ways that you had commemorated your loved one's passing?

Description : What are some of the ways that you had commemorated your loved one's passing?

Last Answer : I planted a garden of daffodils and tulips for my mother which were what were blooming around the time that she died. I like that they come up every year for her. Also some day lillies ... planting things in memory of people because the plants live on, rather than bouquets of flowers that die.

Have you ever cancelled a trip because you were afraid?

Description : Have you ever cancelled a trip because you were afraid?

Last Answer : Are you saying that your dead husband won’t be able to find you?

Adopted mother slowly starves quadrapalegic daughter to death (including other gross neglect), gets 10-15 years. What is your opinion of this?

Description : Adopted mother slowly starves quadrapalegic daughter to death (including other gross neglect), gets 10-15 years. What is your opinion of this?

Last Answer : It makes me cry and almost forget that humanity is capable of great things as well.

I have a pain in my back right under my shoulder blade and when I move fast it hurts bad but if i move very slow its ok, what could that be?

Description : I have a pain in my back right under my shoulder blade and when I move fast it hurts bad but if i move very slow its ok, what could that be?

Last Answer : It could be a lot of different things, ranging from easily dismissible to very serious. You don’t want to mess around or take half measures when it comes to your back – this may call for a doctor’s visit. A physical therapist could probably help you, too.

Parents are followers of the hypocrite Pir , what should a child do ? My father died ten years ago and he used to pray five times , but at home. And both father and mother were disciples of Atarshi. I didn't let my mother go after my father died. However, because I am in a madrasa, my mother does not tell me to go there from time to time. But if you don't tell your mother to go , she says , does Pir do the opposite ? By the disciples. Is Pir bad or not ? Now all I know from Hazrat is that my father died before I was admitted to the madrasa. And there was no one to show Dad the right way. What should I do for my father now ? And what is the answer to this question ? Since I don't know much about Atarshi Pir. Obliged by the answer.

Description : Parents are followers of the hypocrite Pir , what should a child do ? My father died ten years ago and he used to pray five times , but at home. And both father and mother were disciples of Atarshi. ... the answer to this question ? Since I don't know much about Atarshi Pir. Obliged by the answer.

Last Answer : All Haqqani Ulama Mashayikh agree that the said Pir was a hypocrite . Originally, the man was just a metric pass. (See! Atarshir Darbar Atarshir Kafela , page-13 , date of publication , January 1974. ... pray for you , may Allah accept you as a great scholar. May Allah guide your mother. Amen.

Do you worry more about the cleanliness of your home when your mother-in-law visits, or when your mother visits?

Description : Do you worry more about the cleanliness of your home when your mother-in-law visits, or when your mother visits?

Last Answer : answer:Mother in law, dur. My mom “knows” me. :P But then you might feel that way because your in laws aren’t cleanly.

Is it necessary to cancel TIN after father's death ?

Last Answer : The need to cancel TIN after the death of the father depends on his heirs. If there is a business in the name of the father which cancels the TIN then all the business related documents ... cancel the activities of your TIN either through Inspection or Hearing or on the basis of the application.

How to include his property as child after father's death ?

Last Answer : After the death of the father, his property will be distributed among the children by inheritance. In this case, in order to include the said property as the property of the heirs, there must be a ... tax will be levied on this property. In this case, the commissioner will take the final decision.

Should we worry about the "death of handwriting"?

Description : Should we worry about the "death of handwriting"?

Last Answer : No more than we worry about the death of hand-sewing, or the death of baking bread. Handwriting is a skill that was essential in the past, and which is becoming less and less so. Like hand-sewing, it' ... be kept alive by enthusiasts, and if there is ever a need for it, people can learn it again.

If death meant leaving the stage long enough to change & come back as a new character...Would you slow down or speed up?

Description : If death meant leaving the stage long enough to change & come back as a new character...Would you slow down or speed up?

Last Answer : I’d slow down and probably commit many more ‘sins’.

My father's parents were both half Native American but from different tribes. My mother has no Native American claims. What percentage NA am I?

Description : My father's parents were both half Native American but from different tribes. My mother has no Native American claims. What percentage NA am I?

Last Answer : ~10–20% you could end up with more or less because genetics is more complicated than simple percentages.

Do you have any advice for a single mother whose daughter is starting overnights stays at her father's?

Description : Do you have any advice for a single mother whose daughter is starting overnights stays at her father's?

Last Answer : answer: I'm sure ask-public will probably deny this question Why? Take the high road and never talk crap about the other parent. But ask for a meeting with the judge or whoever decided the on the shared ... nothing to do with her dad. It's a right of passage to tell a parent that you hate them.

Is it typical, when registering a child for school, for the forms to ask for the mother and father's highest level of education?

Description : Is it typical, when registering a child for school, for the forms to ask for the mother and father's highest level of education?

Last Answer : This is fairly typical – most likely for demographic reports. If your student enrolls in any AP or IB classes, those tests also ask for parents highest level of education.

Do fathers have rights to say whether they want a child or not when the mother wants an abortion?

Description : Do fathers have rights to say whether they want a child or not when the mother wants an abortion?

Last Answer : I feel like we definitely talked this over before but I can't find where. I fundamentally believe that each person responsible for a child should have a say BUT the person who is to carry that child inside ... his own if he truly wants the child and the mother's role will end once the baby is born.

Aunt/Auntie, Ant/Anty, Aint/Ainty...How do you address your Mother/Father's Sister?

Description : Aunt/Auntie, Ant/Anty, Aint/Ainty...How do you address your Mother/Father's Sister?

Last Answer : I don’t communicate much with my aunt or my uncle, but I call them by their first name.

Of both normal parents, the chances of a male child becoming colour blind are (a) none (b) possible only when all the four grand parents had normal vision (c) possible only when father’s mother was colour blind (d) possible only when mother’s father was colour blind.

Description : Of both normal parents, the chances of a male child becoming colour blind are (a) none (b) possible only when all the four grand parents had normal vision (c) possible only when father’s mother was colour blind (d) possible only when mother’s father was colour blind.

Last Answer : (d) possible only when mother’s father was colour blind.

The average age of 11 daughters of a family is 12yrs. Average age of the daughters together with their parents is 27yrs. If mother is 14yrs younger than father. Then find the father's age A) 127 yrs B) 116.5 yrs C) 168yrs D) 170yrs

Description : The average age of 11 daughters of a family is 12yrs. Average age of the daughters together with their parents is 27yrs. If mother is 14yrs younger than father. Then find the father's age A) 127 yrs B) 116.5 yrs C) 168yrs D) 170yrs

Last Answer : Answer: B) Total age of 11 daughters of a family = 11*12 = 132 father age = 14 +mother age total age of the family (11 daughters + father + mother) is, 132+mother +14+ mother = 27 * 13 mother = 102.5 father age = 14+102.5 =116.5years

D's mother's father is C's father's father-in-law. How are C and D related if D is male and C female? Options: 1) D is C's wife's brother 2) C is sister of D's wife 3) D is C's brother 4) C is mother of D's wife

Description : D's mother's father is C's father's father-in-law. How are C and D related if D is male and C female?  Options: 1) D is C's wife's brother 2) C is sister of D's wife 3) D is C's brother 4) C is mother of D's wife

Last Answer : Correct Answer: D is C's brother 

A son went to his father's house and knocked on the door. When his father answered the door, the son said, 'O.K., today is the day I promised to burn your house to the ground.' 'But I built the house in 1941 with my own two hands. It has a lot of sentimental value, and is still very useful to me,' replied the father. 'Too bad,' said the son, 'but I have always loathed it, especially in the wintertime, and I grew to especially hate it since you added that second hole to it when you built the addition to the house when I was a teenager.' 'But if you burn the house down, where will I go?' asked the father. 'You will just have to go where most people go in these modern times,' answered the son. 'Well, I guess you're right,' said his father. The son then promptly escorted his father outside, wh

Description : A son went to his father's house and knocked on the door. When his father answered the door, the son said, 'O.K., today is the day I promised to burn your house to the ground.' 'But I ... 'Well, I guess you're right,' said his father. The son then promptly escorted his father outside, wh -Riddles

Last Answer : The father, although he owned a fully functioning home, had never been able to break himself from the habit of going to the bathroom in the Outhouse he had built for his family back in 1941. The son, ... the son had been trying for some time to get his father to agree to let him burn it down.

After being mistreated by the moderators at Quora for the 3rd time, I started looking for an alternative. Yahoo answers isn't to my taste, several of the others I found in searches are no longer up...is Fluther the best Quora alternative? The layout is ok, but it seems pretty slow compared to Quora.

Description : After being mistreated by the moderators at Quora for the 3rd time, I started looking for an alternative. Yahoo answers isn't to my taste, several of the others I found in searches are no longer up...is Fluther the best Quora alternative? The layout is ok, but it seems pretty slow compared to Quora.

Last Answer : At some point, you need to look more critically at the common denominator and less at others. If you are still blaming others at your age, Fluther may be uncomfortable for you. Or comfy, considering all of the youth.

Death and taxes; taxes and death----- They're sure to be with us, until our last breath. So, try to save money-----How much can you save? They'll nickel us and dime us-----Right down to the grave. And now that you've heard my negative chant, tell me the man's name you hear in my rant. -Riddles

Description : Death and taxes; taxes and death----- They're sure to be with us, until our last breath. So, try to save money-----How much can you save? They'll nickel us and dime us-----Right down to the grave. And now that you've heard my negative chant, tell me the man's name you hear in my rant. -Riddles

Last Answer : The man's name is Nicholas (nickel us).

In "Batman begins", Ra's Al Ghul explains Bruce Wayne parents' death is his father's fault, not Bruce's. Why?

Description : In "Batman begins", Ra's Al Ghul explains Bruce Wayne parents' death is his father's fault, not Bruce's. Why?

Last Answer : Because Bruce was just a kid.

Looking for an 80's cartoon about a boy trying to avenge his father's death by killing the shark and retrieving the knife that his dad left in the shark.

Description : Looking for an 80's cartoon about a boy trying to avenge his father's death by killing the shark and retrieving the knife that his dad left in the shark.

Last Answer : There is a story called “Ghost of the Lagoon” apparently about a boy named Mako who wants to kill a shark named Tupa for revenge- this may be the subject of the cartoon. There’s a YouTube video if you Google this, but I can’t see the videos at work, so don’t know if it’s what you are looking for.

This man was on death row and only family members could see him this man walks up to the gaurd and says 'Brothers and sisters have I none' but this mans father is my fathers son The gaurd let him in How is he related? -Riddles

Description : This man was on death row and only family members could see him this man walks up to the gaurd and says 'Brothers and sisters have I none' but this mans father is my fathers son The gaurd let him in How is he related? -Riddles

Last Answer : The father going to see his son on death row

Who famously duelled Alexander Hamilton on 11 July 1804, resulting in the founding father’s death? -History

Description : Who famously duelled Alexander Hamilton on 11 July 1804, resulting in the founding father’s death? -History

Last Answer : Aaron Burr duelled Alexander Hamilton.

Which of the following statements about Google App Engine (GAE) is INCORRECT. A. It’s a Platform as a Service (PaaS) model. B. Automatic Scalability is built in with GAE. As a developer you don’t need to worry about application scalability C. You can decide on how many physical servers required for hosting your application. D. The applications deployed on GAE have the same security, privacy and data protection policies as that of Google’s applications. So, applications can take advantage of reliability, performance and security of Google’s infrastructure.

Description : Which of the following statements about Google App Engine (GAE) is INCORRECT. A. It's a Platform as a Service (PaaS) model. B. Automatic Scalability is built in with GAE. As ... s applications. So, applications can take advantage of reliability, performance and security of Google's infrastructure.

Last Answer : You can decide on how many physical servers required for hosting your application.

Is it still considered "invalidation" of a person's feelings if you tell or assure them not to be afraid, to not worry, or not be embarrassed?

Description : Is it still considered "invalidation" of a person's feelings if you tell or assure them not to be afraid, to not worry, or not be embarrassed?

Last Answer : Well, stated as such, at the very least is unhelpful. Instead of a statement, a question would be more compassionate, and possibly helpful. “Is there some way we can make this less frightening/embarrassing/upsetting? I’m on your side, does that help?”

I like to shop online, but I worry about entering my personal information at various sites. How can I tell if a site is safe?

Description : I like to shop online, but I worry about entering my personal information at various sites. How can I tell if a site is safe?

Last Answer : First of all, shop only with online merchants you trust. Consider entering your payment card numbers each time you purchase something, instead of allowing the site to store your number for future purchases. Then ... the site. Simply enter the site's name plus the word complaints in a Web browser.

How do you say "keep looking at the ground don't worry about the floor" in French?

Description : How do you say "keep looking at the ground don't worry about the floor" in French?

Last Answer : “Terre” is earth; could work.

What safety things did your mom do when you were little that you don't think most moms worry about?

Description : What safety things did your mom do when you were little that you don't think most moms worry about?

Last Answer : answer:An adult (my mom, or dad or relative) was always with us when we were in the neighborhood play ground till we were about 12 or at least with a older sibling. I had to have one of my ... something. Not so cool when you had the runs or nausea. Whatever she gave me just came right back up.

Where is the kid saying "worry about yourself I don't need help with my seatbelt" video?

Description : Where is the kid saying "worry about yourself I don't need help with my seatbelt" video?

Last Answer : You can watch it here.

A tornado is headed your way! Asuming you don't have kids to worry about, can you name the three most important things you would grab to take in the basement with you?

Description : A tornado is headed your way! Asuming you don't have kids to worry about, can you name the three most important things you would grab to take in the basement with you?

Last Answer : My pets (all six of them).

Why do you think it was Bob Marley who wrote the song “Don’t worry be happy”?

Description : Why do you think it was Bob Marley who wrote the song “Don’t worry be happy”?

Last Answer : Never heard anyone say it was Bob Marley. Bobby McFerrin and Bob Marley sound nothing alike anyways.

Itching all over the body , what is the solution ? Which medicine should I use ? My mother has a lot of itching all over her body. I have used scabies cream , fexo tablets in the morning, ketoral tablets , jairil tablets at night for 1 month. Also Ibn Sina's Nimi tablet. No work. After taking the medicine, it gets a little better and reappears. I have also used Dermasol N Cream. Suggest the latest what I can do.

Description : Itching all over the body , what is the solution ? Which medicine should I use ? My mother has a lot of itching all over her body. I have used scabies cream , fexo tablets in the morning, ketoral ... a little better and reappears. I have also used Dermasol N Cream. Suggest the latest what I can do.

Last Answer : Anyway, brother, I will tell you the name of a syrup, it will tell you to massage it all over your mother's body, only this, you don't have to take any more medicine. Your mother will massage ... ask to massage the whole body, you will get good results in 4/5 days. Tetrasol syrup costs 6 rupees.

Computer freezes randomly and gets slow? Happens every couple weeks?

Description : Computer freezes randomly and gets slow? Happens every couple weeks?

Last Answer : do you leave it on all the time? what os? what are the specs?