What do you do after an abusive and controlling relationship and you have nothing ?

What do you do after an abusive and controlling relationship and you have nothing ?
by

1 Answer

Answer :

answer:You don’t have nothing, darlin’. You’ve got yourself back. Now you just have to find out who that is and how to be it. Any interest in going back to school? or looking for a job? or both? Give yourself some time. There are plenty of guys out there in the world who will treat you right. Meanwhile you’ve got yourself to look after. So don’t rush into anything. Thank goodness your parents are there for you.
by

Related questions

Did you ever have a relationship with a person who was emotionally abusive?

Description : Did you ever have a relationship with a person who was emotionally abusive?

Last Answer : Not a sexual relationship. I have however been around people who were emotionally abusive

How do I speak with her about her abusive relationship?

Description : How do I speak with her about her abusive relationship?

Last Answer : answer:What you don't have to do is take verbal abuse from this jerk. Tell him and her the next time he speaks to you like that, you are out of there. As to her hearing you, all you can do is say, ... domestic abuse hotline) 888-743-5754. Then you have to let it go. It's up to her at that point.

What are some subtle ways of being abusive?

Description : What are some subtle ways of being abusive?

Last Answer : Ignoring someone is a pretty good way to mess with someone. Making up lies also can push someone away.

People who have been in foster care, would staying in an abusive home have been better?

Description : People who have been in foster care, would staying in an abusive home have been better?

Last Answer : For many people, being in ‘foster care’ was just, if not more, abusive than staying at home

Where do you draw the line when parenting goes from over-caring to abusive behaviour?

Description : Where do you draw the line when parenting goes from over-caring to abusive behaviour?

Last Answer : answer:

Did you have an abusive parent (or parents)?

Description : Did you have an abusive parent (or parents)?

Last Answer : Would you please specifically define “abusive” here? There are different kinds of parental abuse that can irrevocably damage a child.

How should I treat an "ex" who was verbally and physically abusive when he's at a party I'm attending?

Description : How should I treat an "ex" who was verbally and physically abusive when he's at a party I'm attending?

Last Answer : Wow. The answer is very individual and probably so complicated that you should work it out with your therapist. You don't have control over your emotional reaction. You feel how you feel and that's neither good ... though, that's why if I were in your shoes I'd spend a few session with a therapist.

Which is more harmful to children: Parents that are neglectful/do not care, or parents that are abusive, like neonazis or religious fundamentalists?

Description : Which is more harmful to children: Parents that are neglectful/do not care, or parents that are abusive, like neonazis or religious fundamentalists?

Last Answer : Do you mean abusive because their beliefs are anathema to you or do you mean they are abusive to the children in other ways?

If you're from an 'abusive family', do you think you have a sixth sense about other people who were abused?

Description : If you're from an 'abusive family', do you think you have a sixth sense about other people who were abused?

Last Answer : I'm not very good at picking out other people who were abused, but I think that's partially because I was gaslighted about it for many years. A friend of mine who was abused and who had the resources to ... who around me might have been abused. But like I said, I'm not very good at it yet.

Worst abusive mother ever. What should I do now?

Description : Worst abusive mother ever. What should I do now?

Last Answer : answer:Well, for starters, you should probably see if you can get this question moved to General, because it's obviously a question that you want to have answered seriously - since it's such a serious topic ... the future; it comes down to how you deal with it and map out your actions from now on.

Would you say ”lumping” is an abusive way to punish a child, better or worse than corporal punishment?

Description : Would you say ”lumping” is an abusive way to punish a child, better or worse than corporal punishment?

Last Answer : No.. you would lose your children's trust I would at least have them do something meaningful like volunteer at a soup kitchen and help some one . I had a math teacher who made grade 7 students write math ... 1 , 2 times 1 = 2 until you got to a magnitude of 10's and double for each infraction.

"You have to be a parent to understand." Does anyone else find that some (not all) parents use this line or a line like this to justify for their own abusive behaviour?

Description : "You have to be a parent to understand." Does anyone else find that some (not all) parents use this line or a line like this to justify for their own abusive behaviour?

Last Answer : It ranks right up with “Do it because I said so”. Idiots.

What percentage of men are abusive physically or sexually?

Description : What percentage of men are abusive physically or sexually?

Last Answer : answer:This link explains most batterers over estimation of battering behaviors. Not quite what you have in mind maybe but, ties in. www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2010/03/100309131800.htm

How do they fix abusive people, anyway?

Description : How do they fix abusive people, anyway?

Last Answer : They probably go untreated and become politicians, ceos and soldiers.

How can I deal with an abusive mother when I have come to her home to heal?

Description : How can I deal with an abusive mother when I have come to her home to heal?

Last Answer : answer:Wow! That sounds horrible! I hope you can find a way to get out of there asap. But meanwhile, I'm not sure. Your relationship with your mother has been established for decades, I presume. It' ... over. She's a mother. Parents always break down sooner or later. Keep telling her what you want.

If I have been physically abusive towards my girlfriend is it possible for me to get help and it actually work?

Description : If I have been physically abusive towards my girlfriend is it possible for me to get help and it actually work?

Last Answer : answer:First of all, you can change if you want to – for you. Not for anyone else. You are aware of the problem, you discuss it and want to do something about it. This is a first step. Get professional help. Quit drinking. But it is possible if you do this.

How would you handle the death of an abusive parent?

Description : How would you handle the death of an abusive parent?

Last Answer : I will answer this when I get back from a funeral today (NOT an abusive family member) but I wanted you to know that I’ve been there in the past and I’ll be thinking of you.

Is it better to have an absent father, a paper father or an abusive father?

Description : Is it better to have an absent father, a paper father or an abusive father?

Last Answer : answer:Of the three situations, I would have to say an absentee father would be my chosen, followed by a paper father, then an abusive one. I hope it's clear why I would pick the abusive one as a last ... they cared or loved me as in a paper dad case, what good would it do to have them around?

What can I do if my brother is 3 years older than me and is really abusive to me and my mum?

Description : What can I do if my brother is 3 years older than me and is really abusive to me and my mum?

Last Answer : Call the police and/or file a CPS report. If you are in school tell your teacher or principal – they are required to report it and can get you the help you and your family need. If he is abusive to you that is illegal, and a crime.

How can I stop dreaming about my abusive ex?

Description : How can I stop dreaming about my abusive ex?

Last Answer : answer:When things are doing really well in your life, I don't think it is uncommon to fear the worst could happen. In your case, because your past relationship was so bad, a return to it would be ... from reaching that safe place increases. I hope that you will be very happy and wish you the best.

Is there anything you can do to help a loved one in an abusive situation?

Description : Is there anything you can do to help a loved one in an abusive situation?

Last Answer : answer:I have never seen a violent abuse situation get better it only gets worse especially when the victim attempts to distance themselves from the abuser. I have seen one abusive realtionship get better when ... them and check in on them frequently. Be ready to call in outside help if need be.

How do you deal with abusive older brothers?

Description : How do you deal with abusive older brothers?

Last Answer : You may have to remove yourself if he's ignoring your demands to stop hitting you. If you leave to a trusted relative's or friend's place for a little while, perhaps your parents and brother might ... think about how you're going to deal with these relationships and how to get on with your life.

What should I do about my abusive brother?

Description : What should I do about my abusive brother?

Last Answer : I’m usually not one for physical violence, but it sounds like he needs his ass kicked. If he’s physically attacking his mother, then it’s time for corporal punishment. You should probably edit the title question because it might get modded….

Is multi-tasking abusive?

Description : Is multi-tasking abusive?

Last Answer : I have deliberately kept my life relatively simple as I function musch better when not over-stressed. I am fortunate to be able to afford to work only part time and do not carry a cellphone on purpose ... all that comes at one in America today and partly because of Fluther! (Seriously.) But I try .

I'm dealing with a co-worker who's partner is emotionally abusive? Why are people emotionally abusive?

Description : I'm dealing with a co-worker who's partner is emotionally abusive? Why are people emotionally abusive?

Last Answer : A better question might be, what is your coworker doing about it?

What’s a toxic/abusive trait that no one pays attention to ?

Description : What’s a toxic/abusive trait that no one pays attention to ?

Last Answer : answer:Discussing sensitive topics constantly, treating you like a therapist. It’s very blatantly toxic and a red flag but we all ignore it, sometimes constantly hearing someone else’s issues in life isn’t healthy.

Is it abusive or illegal to shoot or poison a dog that has bit someone and is still aggressive and threatening toward people?

Description : Is it abusive or illegal to shoot or poison a dog that has bit someone and is still aggressive and threatening toward people?

Last Answer : answer:I'm pretty sure cruelty to animals in any circumstance is still cruelty to animals. If a person bites me and I poison or shoot that person, is it still murder? If an overly aggressive dog gets to ... be near people and needs to be euthanized, take it to a vet so it can be done humanely.

My friend, who is a druggie and looks kind of scary at first sight, but is actuallly very nice, sometimes has anger issues and a short temper, will he be fine in the future? Or do you think he will be very violent to be around and abusive?

Description : My friend, who is a druggie and looks kind of scary at first sight, but is actuallly very nice, sometimes has anger issues and a short temper, will he be fine in the future? Or do you think he will be very violent to be around and abusive?

Last Answer : Well.. you can never know for sure… as long as he isn’t physically abusive, because everyone can have anger issues. He could work it out, tell him about how scary he is during when he lashes out, and maybe he could change.

What childhood memories did you not realize were abusive until later in life?

Description : What childhood memories did you not realize were abusive until later in life?

Last Answer : When I was young, some "very friendly" man from an internet chat room got me to call him on the regular phone and say phrases to him, which I realized years later were sexual and that he was ... having to get "cleaned up" near the end of our conversations afterwards and I just didn't get it.

What are some good passive aggressive comments or actions to combat a verbally abusive narcissistic boss?

Description : What are some good passive aggressive comments or actions to combat a verbally abusive narcissistic boss?

Last Answer : Basically any comment that's malicious compliance. If they tell you to do something that you know is going to result in a huge fuck up, don't correct them but instead say you're the boss and you ... you get it in writing via an email so you have evidence for when inevitably they try to blame you.

Why do people stay in abusive relationships?

Description : Why do people stay in abusive relationships?

Last Answer : People stay in abusive relationship because they believed they are in love and as such they can still change the abusive person in due time.What the forget is that an abusive person will always be one ... to move on so they decide to stay put until they are able to financially sort themselves out.

What are examples of abusive tax shelters?

Description : What are examples of abusive tax shelters?

Last Answer : Offshore tax havens are an example of abusive tax shelters. For more information about abusive tax shelters, visit http://www.irs.gov/individuals/content/0,,id=97749,00.html

I am a disabled woman in an abusive environment. I don't want a woman's shelter - I really need an apartment or house for personal reasons. Thank you?

Description : I am a disabled woman in an abusive environment. I don't want a woman's shelter - I really need an apartment or house for personal reasons. Thank you?

Last Answer : You can contact social services and they will help you locate another place to live.

A dominant entity is the entity a) on the N side in a 1 : N relationship b) on the 1 side in a 1 : N relationship c) on either side in a 1 : 1 relationship d) nothing to do with 1 : 1 or 1 : N relationship

Description : A dominant entity is the entity a) on the N side in a 1 : N relationship b) on the 1 side in a 1 : N relationship c) on either side in a 1 : 1 relationship d) nothing to do with 1 : 1 or 1 : N relationship

Last Answer : d) nothing to do with 1 : 1 or 1 : N relationship

What would mankind and the world be like when the great majority believes there is nothing else after this life?

Description : What would mankind and the world be like when the great majority believes there is nothing else after this life?

Last Answer : Honestly, I think John Lennon said it all.

Is it controlling if you expect your partner home by a certain time?

Description : Is it controlling if you expect your partner home by a certain time?

Last Answer : answer:Well. Each relationship has its own rules. Sounds like you might want to have a discussion with him about it. Simply telling a man he HAS to be home at a certain time, or any ultimatums for that ... , fishing isn't a timed activity. Sucks to leave em biting. ' Good luck. Peace n love.

How do you handle toxic or controlling family members?

Description : How do you handle toxic or controlling family members?

Last Answer : answer:The only thing to do is make a clean break. In the case of his parents, presumably they managed to stay alive as functioning human beings long before he ever existed, and certainly long before he was ... put up with it, and you do have the right to choose who you grant your precious time to.

Should I fight for us, do nothing and wait and see, or move on for good?

Description : Should I fight for us, do nothing and wait and see, or move on for good?

Last Answer : So he is still with another partner, but calling you. That should tell you what kind of person he is. I know it’s really hard to move on, but I think you need to and tell him to stop contacting you. It keeps you hanging on to a man that is no longer really into you.

What do you do when nothing is going your way?

Description : What do you do when nothing is going your way?

Last Answer : Read. Listen to Jazz. Tell myself that it will pass. And so far, it always has.

Someone I had just met died last week yet I feel nothing?

Description : Someone I had just met died last week yet I feel nothing?

Last Answer : Why should you feel any more than what one human might feel for another human acquaintance?

How do you dissolve friendships that do nothing but irk you?

Description : How do you dissolve friendships that do nothing but irk you?

Last Answer : Abruptly.

Why do I feel extreme guilt sometimes for nothing?

Description : Why do I feel extreme guilt sometimes for nothing?

Last Answer : answer:It sounds like either hormones or just over thinking to me. When I feel stuff like that I go work out or help someone in need. It does wonders to stop the mind from wandering and over analyzing stuff.

What would bring on an anxious feeling, when I have nothing to feel anxious about?

Description : What would bring on an anxious feeling, when I have nothing to feel anxious about?

Last Answer : Something in the back of your mind giving you signals? Aren’t you about to be traveling? Maybe you think you’ve forgotten to pack something or are a little nervous about the trip, but are not consciously aware of it.

What would you do if you had a spare week with nothing to do?

Description : What would you do if you had a spare week with nothing to do?

Last Answer : Sleep, run errands, veg out, catch up on reading/tv/movies

If you come to know nothing new is happening in your life,What will you do?

Description : If you come to know nothing new is happening in your life,What will you do?

Last Answer : It depends. Is it a good situation? If I’m content, then I probably wouldn’t do anything about it. If not, it’s up to me to make a move… find a hobby, volunteer, make a new friend, read an interesting book, take a class, do something.

Name one thing that you've changed about your behavior/way of being, which in the past gave you nothing but grief?

Description : Name one thing that you've changed about your behavior/way of being, which in the past gave you nothing but grief?

Last Answer : Quit smoking 22 years ago and have approx 2 alchoholic beverages a year. But with the second one I can’t say it was all bad. haha Haven’t been a doormat in decades. THAT I like !

Can you have some or all your limbs amputated voluntarily if there is nothing wrong with them?

Description : Can you have some or all your limbs amputated voluntarily if there is nothing wrong with them?

Last Answer : No, not by a member of the medical profession.

Why does nothing interest me?

Description : Why does nothing interest me?

Last Answer : answer:All of those activities are media-centric and most are consumption-based. There are lots of other activities that have nothing to do with media and more to do with production (or just being) than consumption. ... a mild winter. It was a great job. Now I deliver flowers. It's not bad either.

Do you have to know the reason why when someone you care about deeply acts like you're nothing?

Description : Do you have to know the reason why when someone you care about deeply acts like you're nothing?

Last Answer : I always want to know why. However, i have learned to stop letting it drive me crazy. Time spent trying to figure it out without the other person’s input is wasted time. People will not always give a straight answer. They have their own reasons for that.

Since there is something, can there ever be nothing?

Description : Since there is something, can there ever be nothing?

Last Answer : Some schools of philosophy argue that there is no “we,” so everything is nothing.