People who have been in foster care, would staying in an abusive home have been better?

People who have been in foster care, would staying in an abusive home have been better?
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For many people, being in ‘foster care’ was just, if not more, abusive than staying at home
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Are those Texas momon cult kids better off in foster care or with their whacko mothers?

Description : Are those Texas momon cult kids better off in foster care or with their whacko mothers?

Last Answer : answer:This whole thing was kicked off by some 33 y.o. woman in Colorado calling the police and pretending to be a 16 y.o abused girl in the compound. The entire probable cause in this ... legitimate probable cause does eventually emerge, I think the kids should be returned with a great big apology.

Which is more harmful to children: Parents that are neglectful/do not care, or parents that are abusive, like neonazis or religious fundamentalists?

Description : Which is more harmful to children: Parents that are neglectful/do not care, or parents that are abusive, like neonazis or religious fundamentalists?

Last Answer : Do you mean abusive because their beliefs are anathema to you or do you mean they are abusive to the children in other ways?

Would you say ”lumping” is an abusive way to punish a child, better or worse than corporal punishment?

Description : Would you say ”lumping” is an abusive way to punish a child, better or worse than corporal punishment?

Last Answer : No.. you would lose your children's trust I would at least have them do something meaningful like volunteer at a soup kitchen and help some one . I had a math teacher who made grade 7 students write math ... 1 , 2 times 1 = 2 until you got to a magnitude of 10's and double for each infraction.

Is it better to have an absent father, a paper father or an abusive father?

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Do you think there should be a reconsideration about the foster care system in the Untied States?

Description : Do you think there should be a reconsideration about the foster care system in the Untied States?

Last Answer : answer:During the years following World War II, the U.S. began closing orphanages - large residential institutions - and transitioning to group homes and foster care. Traditional orphanages are no longer a ... care about were to enter the foster system, which seems too much like a game of roulette.

What do you think of this case, where a 200 pound 3rd grader was placed in foster care because (the state said) the mother wasn't doing enough to control his weight?

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Last Answer : The state has a point. The question is whether the kid can be predicted to fare better when thrown to the whims of he state. When does the need for clinical intervention overtake the nurturing of a loving parent?

In your opinion, is putting obese kids into foster care a wise plan?

Description : In your opinion, is putting obese kids into foster care a wise plan?

Last Answer : No, putting any kids into foster care (the kind that exists in NYC, anyhow) isn’t a wise plan. Besides, I don’t see why the solution can’t be provision of same intervention for the entire family. Do you know how I’d cope with being forced away from my family? By eating. NOT ideal.

What would happen if in the Foster Care System, Kids were kept at ONE foster-family instead of house-hopping?

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Last Answer : The foster family may not have enough income to have a child for an extended period of time.

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If I have been physically abusive towards my girlfriend is it possible for me to get help and it actually work?

Description : If I have been physically abusive towards my girlfriend is it possible for me to get help and it actually work?

Last Answer : answer:First of all, you can change if you want to – for you. Not for anyone else. You are aware of the problem, you discuss it and want to do something about it. This is a first step. Get professional help. Quit drinking. But it is possible if you do this.

In the debate concerning universal health care versus affordable health care, who do you think is the culprit in the cost of staying healthy?

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What's it like to live in a foster home?

Description : What's it like to live in a foster home?

Last Answer : And would you find the following insensitive: 1. As a joke of irony, the foster parent is a pedophile. (But he has a clear record, of course, so the state lets him be a foster ... the kids get interviewed by an aspiring adoptive couple. The couple consists of an abusive husband and passive wife.

If you're from an 'abusive family', do you think you have a sixth sense about other people who were abused?

Description : If you're from an 'abusive family', do you think you have a sixth sense about other people who were abused?

Last Answer : I'm not very good at picking out other people who were abused, but I think that's partially because I was gaslighted about it for many years. A friend of mine who was abused and who had the resources to ... who around me might have been abused. But like I said, I'm not very good at it yet.

How do they fix abusive people, anyway?

Description : How do they fix abusive people, anyway?

Last Answer : They probably go untreated and become politicians, ceos and soldiers.

I'm dealing with a co-worker who's partner is emotionally abusive? Why are people emotionally abusive?

Description : I'm dealing with a co-worker who's partner is emotionally abusive? Why are people emotionally abusive?

Last Answer : A better question might be, what is your coworker doing about it?

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Last Answer : answer:I'm pretty sure cruelty to animals in any circumstance is still cruelty to animals. If a person bites me and I poison or shoot that person, is it still murder? If an overly aggressive dog gets to ... be near people and needs to be euthanized, take it to a vet so it can be done humanely.

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Last Answer : People stay in abusive relationship because they believed they are in love and as such they can still change the abusive person in due time.What the forget is that an abusive person will always be one ... to move on so they decide to stay put until they are able to financially sort themselves out.

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Last Answer : answer:That defeats the purpose of why it was suggested you play. The suggestion was given to get you outside and walking. On a recent question you said,“don’t tell me to go outside and walk.” So I am not telling you that. I am just reiterating that is why Pokemon Go was recommended to you.

If and when you get to a point in life where you can no longer drive, would you be willing to leave your home for an assisted living situation, or would you insist on staying home and burdening others with helping you out?

Description : If and when you get to a point in life where you can no longer drive, would you be willing to leave your home for an assisted living situation, or would you insist on staying home and burdening others with helping you out?

Last Answer : answer:If the wording of this question isn't biased, I don't know what is. I don't think it matters what you or I think about it. It's their life and they shouldn't have to go live in ... person's vision is their biggest problem, I don't think sticking them in a facility is necessarily a good idea.

How long could you tolerate staying home, assuming you've got no health conditions, before you get restless and feel an urge to go somewhere outside of your house/property?

Description : How long could you tolerate staying home, assuming you've got no health conditions, before you get restless and feel an urge to go somewhere outside of your house/property?

Last Answer : Not even a full day.

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Last Answer : answer:Remember that you don't have to say why you have been out of the workforce, no need to tell about PTSD or health or your husband's health. Just, I am now able to re-enter the workforce, ... job in a similar position would work well for you, and provide a means to move up quickly. Good luck!

What do you expect from guest staying in your home for a few days, versus someone staying for a week or longer?

Description : What do you expect from guest staying in your home for a few days, versus someone staying for a week or longer?

Last Answer : I once had a guest who never changed out of her nightgown. It was a problem because we were homeschooling, and it set the wrong tone for our school day. I asked her to get dressed, and she objected. Strange….

What do you think is a harder job - staying at home full time with several preschool-age children or going to work full time?

Description : What do you think is a harder job - staying at home full time with several preschool-age children or going to work full time?

Last Answer : answer:You might enjoy the discussion we had recently here. I think they are both difficult and rewarding in their own ways. I think it depends on the individual circumstances.

Twenty seven ducks are going to the pond. Five of them got lost, thirteen of them are staying home, nine of them are at the pond.Where are the rest of them -Riddles

Description : Twenty seven ducks are going to the pond. Five of them got lost, thirteen of them are staying home, nine of them are at the pond.Where are the rest of them -Riddles

Last Answer : There aren't any anywhere else

who do i call for home owner with mold problem who refuses to fix problem and tenants are staying sick?

Description : who do i call for home owner with mold problem who refuses to fix problem and tenants are staying sick?

Last Answer : Sounds like both you and your wife(if you are quoting her correctly) are being a bit dramatic. I doubt you are by your wife's side every hour of every day. I doubt that not having you with her always is ... to do and when it will work for her for you to do it, but make the you time non-negotiable.

Where do you draw the line when parenting goes from over-caring to abusive behaviour?

Description : Where do you draw the line when parenting goes from over-caring to abusive behaviour?

Last Answer : answer:

Did you have an abusive parent (or parents)?

Description : Did you have an abusive parent (or parents)?

Last Answer : Would you please specifically define “abusive” here? There are different kinds of parental abuse that can irrevocably damage a child.

How should I treat an "ex" who was verbally and physically abusive when he's at a party I'm attending?

Description : How should I treat an "ex" who was verbally and physically abusive when he's at a party I'm attending?

Last Answer : Wow. The answer is very individual and probably so complicated that you should work it out with your therapist. You don't have control over your emotional reaction. You feel how you feel and that's neither good ... though, that's why if I were in your shoes I'd spend a few session with a therapist.

Worst abusive mother ever. What should I do now?

Description : Worst abusive mother ever. What should I do now?

Last Answer : answer:Well, for starters, you should probably see if you can get this question moved to General, because it's obviously a question that you want to have answered seriously - since it's such a serious topic ... the future; it comes down to how you deal with it and map out your actions from now on.

How do I speak with her about her abusive relationship?

Description : How do I speak with her about her abusive relationship?

Last Answer : answer:What you don't have to do is take verbal abuse from this jerk. Tell him and her the next time he speaks to you like that, you are out of there. As to her hearing you, all you can do is say, ... domestic abuse hotline) 888-743-5754. Then you have to let it go. It's up to her at that point.

"You have to be a parent to understand." Does anyone else find that some (not all) parents use this line or a line like this to justify for their own abusive behaviour?

Description : "You have to be a parent to understand." Does anyone else find that some (not all) parents use this line or a line like this to justify for their own abusive behaviour?

Last Answer : It ranks right up with “Do it because I said so”. Idiots.

What percentage of men are abusive physically or sexually?

Description : What percentage of men are abusive physically or sexually?

Last Answer : answer:This link explains most batterers over estimation of battering behaviors. Not quite what you have in mind maybe but, ties in. www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2010/03/100309131800.htm

What are some subtle ways of being abusive?

Description : What are some subtle ways of being abusive?

Last Answer : Ignoring someone is a pretty good way to mess with someone. Making up lies also can push someone away.

How would you handle the death of an abusive parent?

Description : How would you handle the death of an abusive parent?

Last Answer : I will answer this when I get back from a funeral today (NOT an abusive family member) but I wanted you to know that I’ve been there in the past and I’ll be thinking of you.

What can I do if my brother is 3 years older than me and is really abusive to me and my mum?

Description : What can I do if my brother is 3 years older than me and is really abusive to me and my mum?

Last Answer : Call the police and/or file a CPS report. If you are in school tell your teacher or principal – they are required to report it and can get you the help you and your family need. If he is abusive to you that is illegal, and a crime.

How can I stop dreaming about my abusive ex?

Description : How can I stop dreaming about my abusive ex?

Last Answer : answer:When things are doing really well in your life, I don't think it is uncommon to fear the worst could happen. In your case, because your past relationship was so bad, a return to it would be ... from reaching that safe place increases. I hope that you will be very happy and wish you the best.

What do you do after an abusive and controlling relationship and you have nothing ?

Description : What do you do after an abusive and controlling relationship and you have nothing ?

Last Answer : answer:You don't have nothing, darlin'. You've got yourself back. Now you just have to find out who that is and how to be it. Any interest in going back to school? or looking for a job? or ... 've got yourself to look after. So don't rush into anything. Thank goodness your parents are there for you.

Is there anything you can do to help a loved one in an abusive situation?

Description : Is there anything you can do to help a loved one in an abusive situation?

Last Answer : answer:I have never seen a violent abuse situation get better it only gets worse especially when the victim attempts to distance themselves from the abuser. I have seen one abusive realtionship get better when ... them and check in on them frequently. Be ready to call in outside help if need be.

Did you ever have a relationship with a person who was emotionally abusive?

Description : Did you ever have a relationship with a person who was emotionally abusive?

Last Answer : Not a sexual relationship. I have however been around people who were emotionally abusive

How do you deal with abusive older brothers?

Description : How do you deal with abusive older brothers?

Last Answer : You may have to remove yourself if he's ignoring your demands to stop hitting you. If you leave to a trusted relative's or friend's place for a little while, perhaps your parents and brother might ... think about how you're going to deal with these relationships and how to get on with your life.

What should I do about my abusive brother?

Description : What should I do about my abusive brother?

Last Answer : I’m usually not one for physical violence, but it sounds like he needs his ass kicked. If he’s physically attacking his mother, then it’s time for corporal punishment. You should probably edit the title question because it might get modded….

Is multi-tasking abusive?

Description : Is multi-tasking abusive?

Last Answer : I have deliberately kept my life relatively simple as I function musch better when not over-stressed. I am fortunate to be able to afford to work only part time and do not carry a cellphone on purpose ... all that comes at one in America today and partly because of Fluther! (Seriously.) But I try .

What’s a toxic/abusive trait that no one pays attention to ?

Description : What’s a toxic/abusive trait that no one pays attention to ?

Last Answer : answer:Discussing sensitive topics constantly, treating you like a therapist. It’s very blatantly toxic and a red flag but we all ignore it, sometimes constantly hearing someone else’s issues in life isn’t healthy.

My friend, who is a druggie and looks kind of scary at first sight, but is actuallly very nice, sometimes has anger issues and a short temper, will he be fine in the future? Or do you think he will be very violent to be around and abusive?

Description : My friend, who is a druggie and looks kind of scary at first sight, but is actuallly very nice, sometimes has anger issues and a short temper, will he be fine in the future? Or do you think he will be very violent to be around and abusive?

Last Answer : Well.. you can never know for sure… as long as he isn’t physically abusive, because everyone can have anger issues. He could work it out, tell him about how scary he is during when he lashes out, and maybe he could change.

What childhood memories did you not realize were abusive until later in life?

Description : What childhood memories did you not realize were abusive until later in life?

Last Answer : When I was young, some "very friendly" man from an internet chat room got me to call him on the regular phone and say phrases to him, which I realized years later were sexual and that he was ... having to get "cleaned up" near the end of our conversations afterwards and I just didn't get it.

What are some good passive aggressive comments or actions to combat a verbally abusive narcissistic boss?

Description : What are some good passive aggressive comments or actions to combat a verbally abusive narcissistic boss?

Last Answer : Basically any comment that's malicious compliance. If they tell you to do something that you know is going to result in a huge fuck up, don't correct them but instead say you're the boss and you ... you get it in writing via an email so you have evidence for when inevitably they try to blame you.

What are examples of abusive tax shelters?

Description : What are examples of abusive tax shelters?

Last Answer : Offshore tax havens are an example of abusive tax shelters. For more information about abusive tax shelters, visit http://www.irs.gov/individuals/content/0,,id=97749,00.html